Cops

Has awkward writing ever been so entertaining?

Vandalism/Graffiti, Arrest Made

Wednesday, August 10, 2005: 11:34 PM, Haight and Stanyan

They say crime never sleeps and neither did our graffiti artist. Park Station's late night plainclothes officers saw a young man with a marking pen drawing on the wall of the CALA Foods at Haight and Stanyan. He told the officers that; "if I had a spray can I would have drawn a large picture on the side of the wall." The cost of repainting the wall was estimated at between $500 and $1000. Our art critic officers took Rembrandt to jail.

Robbery Gun Simulated Note Used

Friday, August 12, 2005: 1:55 PM, 1485 Haight Street (The GAP)

A white male 20 to 30 years old 6', 185 pounds, blond short curly hair, wearing blue jeans green sand colored shirt and carrying a green shoulder bag waited patiently in line until it was his turn to approach the store's cash register. He handed a note to the first cashier stating, "Open the register I have a gun." The cashier told the robber that he could not open the register and a verbal argument ensued with the robber assuring the employee he had a gun and was serious about him opening the register. In the meantime the line of customers behind the robber grew patiently waiting for the robbery to be completed in order to complete their own purchases. The cashier handed the note back to the robber explaining that only the manager could open the register. The very upset robber demanded to speak with the manager. The cashier, being a good employee, called the manager to his station. On the manager's arrival the robber presented his note in a highly agitated manner simulating he had a gun concealed inside his shoulder bag. The manager read the note and opened the register and handed approximately $124 over to the robber who then stormed out of the store. A search for the robber resulted in another man being stopped a few blocks away but the cold show proved to be negative and the good citizen was thanked and released. Our note-writing robber is still at large.

Road Rage-Battery with Serious Injury Arrest Made

Saturday, August 13, 2005: 11:55 AM, Geary and Masonic Street

For an unknown reason a man used his Infiniti to cut off a Jetta and block their forward progress. This enraged motorist then exited his car and forced open the Jetta driver's door and without a word of explanation started punishing the driver who suffered serious deep cuts on his nose and eye. The sharp thinking passenger exited her side of the Jetta and ran to the Infiniti and removed the car keys preventing any escape by its driver, thus forcing him to answer to the Law. The Infiniti owner realizing his predicament immediately chased down the female with his keys ripping part of her clothing and tackling her to the street floor. It was noted in the Officer's report that he out weighted her by over 100 pounds. Well, a pedestrian witness enraged himself over this motorist's unbelievable conduct, rescued the female passenger pinned to the ground underneath her tackler who was screaming at her to return his car keys. The good citizen pulled the road raging man off the lady passenger who continued to clutch his keys. Once freed, she ran into the Lucky Penny Restaurant where an astonished audience had been viewing this unsporting event while eating their meals. She requested the police be called and a restaurant employee dialed 911 and the rest is history. The police arrived and arrested the road maniac who declined to explain his actions; possibly because there is no good explanation for his felony acts and capture by a brave female passenger who proved to be stronger both mentally and physically. Don't you like a story with a good ending?